Do It Anyway
When God first called me to start a women's ministry, I had absolutely no idea what to expect. It was completely uncharted territory for me. It wasn't a question of whether or not this was God speaking - I KNEW it was Him - but I had no clue what it would look like or how I would go about His mission. All I did was say "Yes, Lord, I'll do it."
In the early stages, He was consistently giving me visions, but I wasn't quite "there yet" for lack of a better term. I was waiting for everything to be perfect. I didn't want to invite people into an unfinished barn. I've spent the last 10 years pursuing a career in wedding and event planning, and I couldn't settle for anything less than perfect. But God quickly snapped me out of that mindset and told me to "do it anyway!" I fought tooth and nail for a minute there and kept trying to come up with excuses as to why I should wait, but every time, God's answer was "do it anyway."
So on October 21, 2025, I held my very first "Ladies Fellowship Night". I spent most of the day worrying about all the things: will people actually show up? Will I have enough food? Will they leave when they see there are imperfections in the barn? What if I stumble on my words and say the wrong thing? What if people think it's boring? I could go on but for sake of time, I'll stop there! When 6:00 PM rolled around, and I started seeing car after car, woman after woman flock up the hill to my unfinished, imperfect barn, I would be lying if I said the worries went away. It wasn't until I had multiple women that I've never met come up and thank me for doing this that my nerves started to settle and I began to see the bigger picture.
These ladies didn't come to see perfection nor did they come perfect. They came hungry for Jesus. As I was watching the ladies sit down and eat and to begin connecting with each other, my heart settled even more and Holy Spirit spoke to me. It was more of a "feeling" that came over me but I knew exactly what He was trying to say:
"Daughter, you don't have to have it all figured out BEFORE you come to me. I don't want perfection, I just want your heart. I want you to come and lay it all down and stop trying to carry things you weren't meant to carry. Just as this building may not be perfect, nor are you perfect. But I am more concerned with what's inside than I am about the outward appearance. This building may not be picturesque and perfect, but when it's packed with ladies who are longing for a deeper connection with me, all the imperfections fade away."
After the event came to an end and I sat alone in this shell of a building, I began to remember the visions that God had given me 8 months prior - women kneeling down at the altar - laying their burdens down at the foot of the cross, and I just began to weep. The visions were beautiful and everything around them was perfect and finished. But what I believe God was trying to reveal in me is that there is a process. When we come humbly before the throne, God begins to work in and through us. The perfection is coming!
